Now let me make my position on gyms entirely clear. We all belong to a tribe. You might be a religious or a family person – that’s your tribe. You might like playing football and sleeping with prostitutes.
Well, the tribe I belong to loves watching old or subtitled movies. We’re excited by intense conversations on art, literature and the meaning of things. We like nature viewed at a dawdled pace, not a sprint. We might wander through a glade and remark on the chiaroscuro light. We would not run, because running is both unseemly and tiring. This is because my tribe believes that “fitness” should be viewed with the same sort of suspicion as a Jennifer Aniston film or adherence to the founding principles of the UKIP.